Tuesday, March 25, 2008

how do i do it you ask?


many have this idea that i'm all put together, well here's the deal: it's easy, i'm on speed, a.d.d. meds, anti-depressants, have perfect children with a nanny and my house never gets used, i have a personal trainer and a gourmet cook and a personal stylist...oh no wait that's hollywood. you may think that i have it all put together but let me give you a little heads up. i'm frazzled half the time i'm awake, i wish drugs that enhanced your performance as a mom would be legal and not addictive because i would be one of the first in line to get it, i apparently fake my way through a clean house look, because i prioritize exactly everything i absolutely have to do in order for it to look decent no matter what. so i have read many many many books that say the same darn thing, if your house is organized then it hides the dirtiness, cause a house that has clean floors and counters but there's a lot of crap all over the place hides the fact that you just worked your butt off cleaning the areas that are without clutter. ANYWAYS, have a home where there is a place for everything makes cleaning so much easier, and it looks clean EVEN WHEN ITS NOT! get this if you have everything where it goes people are too mesmerized that they don't notice the yucky floors, and with four kids and loved one gone for a year, trust me sometimes the floors don't get clean, OH unless you have a dog, those things are AWESOME for cleaning up after dinner! highly recommend that! as for the cute outfits and such i don't have much of a wardrobe due to my minimalist idea of if i'm not wearing it then why should it be in my closet? so if you see me on a regular basis you would start to see that i wear a lot of the same thing over and over, but i LOVE everything that is in my wardrobe. the hair and makeup secret is get an easy haircut i currently am sporting a cross between posh and katie holmes look, and the big secret is with makeup, i always forget to take it off at night sooooo, presto! instant makeup every day, just make sure you apply after showers. oh and showers, yeah i like those but sometimes i have to wear a hat to hide the greasy look. hmm lets see any other secrets on how to fake looking all together?...oh yeah when people ask how you are doing as you are at the grocery line (even when you have all kids with you and they are tearing up the joint) you answer "good, thanks" now all this will only fake people out who don't really know you, but it's okay, the people that really know you and know the truth about you (that you are just like everyone else and have really hard days that make you cry and eat a lot of chocolate, or that you wish you could take back that nasty remark that came out so quickly without thinking when you were just trying to figure out your finances online and your child just wanted to ask you for something to drink) and after knowing all those things they still like you (and maybe more?), you can call them a true friend! and as to how to raise yiour kids, i've come to the conclusion that through prayer we can be guided and it's been the same every time i get on my knees "just love them" now if you don't mind i have to get back to my kids who are currently having a crisis over where their dinosaur poster is going to go in their room, everyone is in tears and screaming, oh well so much for faking it all the time!

13 comments:

Amanda said...

XOXO
Love it.
Keep up the good work lady.

Rachel Holloway said...

And you look THAT GREAT after 4 kids?? Okay--now we KNOW it's true--you don't fake a thing--you really DO have it all going right! :)

Cannon Clan said...

all that just makes you more endearing to me. love ya!

Marci said...

i love you...no just kidding, i don't even know you but thank you so much for being human and being willing to admit it. it's so nice to know that i'm not alone.

Mother of the Wild Boys said...

Great post, thanks for letting us all of the hook. :)

melissa said...

Thanks for being real... that makes you all the more amazing! I do have to say, you do "fake" it well and you do look fantastic (and not just for having 4 kids). We all have secrets- thanks for sharing yours! As for the picture taking...it helps to have an awesome camera that does most of the work for you, but thank you! I just posted a few of the pictures from Kelly- they turned out great!

Bonnie said...

Vanessa, you are so cute, honestly! I love this post and identify with a lot of it. One day at a time we can do this, right?

Fleming Family said...

Awesome honesty! It's nice to know there's other women out there that face the same challenges day in and day out, mothers or not. Now, if I could only have a place to put everything in my house it might actually look clean more often. :) We're starting to use your "point" system, and the boys sure are stepping up to the plate. We just need to get all the particulars put together. We've done something like that, but quite after 3 months... hopefully this one will stick!

haley said...

Will you be my new best friend? I love your blog, may aunt just sent it too me. I love that you are NORMAL... and can admit it- but still look perfect. It gives me hope that MAYBE(just maybe)people look at me and think... "man, she has it all together!" I love finding kindred spirits on this blog thing!

girlsmama said...

Love you V! And I know the truth but admire you greatly for the ability to "fake it". I need to learn the house one. That is one spot I haven't learned to fake yet. We really need to get together!

Sally said...

Ok, could you be more funny! Thanks for the post, it made me feel good. I absolutely LOVE that picture!!! AND I love you to death!

Anonymous said...

Okay, this post was so spot on!
I am a Mom of two, up way too late blog roll reading while my dh is on a camping trip.
You just made me laugh and not feel so bad for eating like 8 Halloween kit-kats and seriously wondering when the last time the hallway was vacuumed while I watched Made of Honor.

Anonymous said...

Opps! Now my name has a link. I told you I was up too late!

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