Wednesday, December 1, 2010

why i hate facebook games


arrrrrrragghhhhh! i'm soooo mad i could SPIT!
first i have to do a disclaimer that i do not and will not EVER play any of those stupid facebook games. you know the ones...frontierville and farmville and whaterelseville...because i know myself. oh.yes.i.do.
and no matter how many times someone tries to ask me to give them corn or find their stupid sheep for them, i will not. because i know that i would get sucked in and pay attention to and think about and waste time on,and i would obsess over those stupid games. i don't do well when i waste time. i hate it and it kind of stresses me out. so i just don't go there you know?(i know i should go to therapy, don't even start with me) so why the rant and rage? well let me explain in a little story i like to call:

"the day that my husband totally ruined my day over an app game."

let me set the scene:
the kids and i went and got the flu shot, well for some reason i either was already going to get sick or the flu shot actually made me feel sick, i don't know but like 8 hours after i got the shot i started to get sore all over and my stomach got queasy and i got a gnarly headache. i went to bed not feeling good, and woke up even worse. i did something i don't normally do...i slept in till 10 am. and when i woke up i still felt like crap. jake needed to go to work and katie became my responsibility so i did what every responsible person would do, i rummaged around the messy bed and got a hold of the remote control and asked her:

"do you want to watch a movie?"

katie answered "no, i want to play a game on the itouch."

now i was a little confused because i don't really have that many games on there. well none that she would like i thought.

but apparently while i was in my flu like coma that morning jake had downloaded a couple of apps that she could play.

she got on there and got on a game called "tiny chef" it was new to me. i looked at it and then turned around and started to doze off again.

within 2 minutes she was so over it and wanted to watch the Tinkerbell movie. so i put it on, and went to turn off the game. but i felt kind of bad that the little people were hungry so i fed them some spaghetti. no harm in that right.


span 1 1/2 hours later...


i'm sitting up in the bed, my eyes are bloodshot, but my headache is starting to subside due to the ibuprofen that i popped in about 20 minutes prior to that in between serving my little people. and the "tiny chef" restaurant?

Booming!

i mean i've got so many tiny customers loving me and giving me a positive approval rating. i've got it almost down to a science. katie has decided that i'm not worth her time and has gone to play somewhere else.

but i have to get in the shower...because i should probably try to achieve something that day.

so i try to make sure i place enough food in my little virtual restaurant, and i go and make a huge commitment...

i look into buying a fruitcake. for 300 coins. which i totally worked for. and get this...it was going to take 8 hours to cook. BUT it would feed 1800 people.

no people i'm not kidding. there's a reason why i never ever go there with these kind of games.

sooooo i did it. i buy the freakin fruitcake, and it starts to "cook".

i have spaghetti, cookies and hamburgers going on the other griddles so i can still make sure the little people will be happy. but that fruitcake? that's where the big bucks are.

span 8 hours, homework, guitar lessons, dinner, and cleaning up later...jake asks me to read something he's been working on for work.

i walk downstairs with itouch in hand, my little people are eating chocolate cake, (that takes 1 hour to make) and fruit cake, (that oh yes i did, timed it just right so that i could get somethings done in between the cooking times of the food for my little people) and eating chicken, and cookies.

i place it down next to me in his office, and start to read. he grabs the itouch and i quickly say "don't mess with the game!"

he rolls his eyes and says "relax."

i continue to read.

and i start to hear from behind me "blurb...blurb...blurb..."

then i hear the husband say "hey so how do i get more food for them?"

i spin around and say:



"WHAT?! WHY?! I HAD FOOD FOR THEM FOR LIKE THE NEXT 12 HOURS!!!!! WHY?! WHERE DID IT GO?


WHAT.
DID.
YOU.
DO.?"

i'm like seeing red here. i've not been this angry in like...i don't KNOW WHEN! i try to grab the itouch from the man i call my husband who if i understand correctly....just "trashed" my food that i totally just wasted the whole dang day timing correctly in between trying to be "kind of" productive.

he holds it up at arms length, i'm jumping up and down yelling at him "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST DID THAT!!! "relax" he says! OH MY GOSH YOU JUST RUINED SOOOO MANY HOURS!!!!"

and you know what he did? HE LAUGHED. oooooooooooh noooooooo heeee diiiiiiidn't.


but one look at my face and "HAHAHAHAhaha...ha..ha...h...vanessa? are you serious? i'm sure you can get the food back. you should thank me though, cause you are acting kind of crazy."

and with that i just stormed out mumbling something like "i can't believe that man had the audacity to do that. i can't believe it!" and called my two friends who i knew would laugh and call me stupid. i would laugh and then get over it.
and you know what? i did. get over it.

but you know what else? as i write this post, the husband is in bed next to me getting enough chef bucks to buy fruitcake, and he's talking about expanding the restaurant and he's just bought a new stove...and he's a little upset over the performance of the waiters...they are not moving fast enough for him, and he's wondering if chicken nuggets would be a good seller... but it's all for me he says. yeah whatever.
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60 comments:

DD Lindsey said...

HA-larious! I'm laughing so hard over here it's difficult to type! I get it. I really do. I've had to "block" all of those fbook games because I wasn't getting my sewing done. SEWING! The thing I love most! I get it. Blocked.

Janet said...

Sooo funny!!! Thanks for the laugh. :)

Caroline @ Artfully Caroline said...

Not much facebook (Especially no Facebook games) since I started blogging this summer. I don't miss it one bit. I'd much rather sew and craft than to be enslaved by a virtual farm or restaurant. Crafting is more fun.

Christine said...

This was so funny! Been there and done it and recovered from it all!

zarina said...

I had my little people (sis') askign me why I don't play all those.

my brothers got ipads and he would recommend games that I can play (moron test, bejewel, sthing I cannot remember).

they even downloaded into my iphone.

I am not a game person but when people uses those ipads, I want to play. on my own iphone, just waiting for the time when I'm away from my craft room.

meanwhile, I have 2&3 year old little people showing me how to play the games on those ipads.

anyway, I have seen catfights and scars between the little people over the ipads.

plus, if you have seen my craft room now you would not want to leave it (unless I can get those ipads in there too)

Tas said...

Thank you for reinforcing my aversion to Facebook. Sounds a bit like keeping a tamagotchi alive...

Audrie said...

LOL this is why I don't play those games! I'd be completely sucked in and obsessed!

I Love Crafts said...

I'm with you... once I start playing any type of computer game, I get addicted and don't accomplish anything anymore the whole day! I actually deleted the all off my Ipod computer etc. I have up to now resisted starting a Facebook game and after your story I hope I have the strength to continue resisting!! On the other had, I think I am also addicted to reading blogs like yours...... :)

Karin van D. said...

Hahaha, oh my, I had to laugh so hard reading this, I totally pictured you jumping up and down looking soooo angry :-D

I get it though. It could happen to me. So I don't play games like that either. It's better that way. For me. For everyone :-)

Michele said...

It used to be solitaire that sucked us in. Now we have all kinds of ways to waste time, I mean...relax!

Anonymous said...

Hysterical. Your writing has a definite flavor that no one else's has. Colombian Sassy, perhaps? I always look forward to reading your posts.

My 3-y-o dtr *may* walk around the house like a zombie, as influenced by my husband and I being addicted to Plants vs. Zombies over Thanksgiving break. And she *may* scream "PLANTSVSZOMBIES!" and come running every time she thinks she hears the theme music. And she may also have told me, "Daddy always likes to go with the cherry bomb", as I (erroneously, in her eyes) chose the hot pepper.

I feel your pain.

Hannah said...

oh, you're so not alone here. I refuse to play any of those stupid facebook games for exactly the same reason. My husband showed me Plants vs. Zombies when we were stuck at the airport once, and I think we both quickly realized what a mistake that had been. At least once you beat that game (twice) it loses most of it's obsessive power over you and your productivity.

Anonymous said...

BAHAHAHAHA that's the first belly laugh I've had in ages so thanks for that!! I have to avoid those things at all costs too :)

Charity said...

That is so funny, I do not understand how they become do addicting! I have canceled all but one of mine b/c I was spending hours on those dumb games.

Katie B said...

See, now I can't decide if I want to download that app RIGHT NOW or never download that app! I'm prone to getting sucked in to those things too.

Unknown said...

I'm right there with you, I block every facebook game invite I get because I know that as dumb as I think they are, if I get started then it's hard to turn it off again and then I just end up feeling like the worst mommy in the world and my DH comes home to a MUCH bigger mess than usual.

Four of a Kind said...

that's funny. i can actually imagine this going on between you and jake. i got addicted for farmville while i was pregnant last year. aidan was in school so i timed all of my harvesting to happen during that time. but yeah, i had to let it all die when i had lydia. don't want to get hooked on something like that again!

Jenn said...

Cracking Up!!! {Me, not you...despite what your husband says. ;)} I had quite a giggle thanks to your post this morning.

Hope you're feeling better!

Jen said...

I get stuck in those games bad! Sometimes I even have dreams about them. I was playing an army game and I'd be so worried that my cities would be attacked as I slept that I had horrible nightmares. Or people I didn't know would call me in my dreams and tell me to harvest my crops. I stay away now ;). Blogging is much better.

Diane aka cameldiva said...

Thanks for the laugh! Only because it's been 2 weeks since I quit Frontierville. First it was Farmtown, then it was Farmville, Yoville, Country Life, Zombie Farm....

Those games are purposefully made to appeal to us. They are addictive, timewasters. Now that I've stepped back, I can see how much time I wasted but at the time, all I could see was the cottonfields were ready and, the zombie's were hungry and, I gotta harvest...

Stay away from evilness and spend more time on other pastimes that were more productive :0 Thanks for sharing..

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the laugh! I loved this post!

Kim said...

Oh my gosh! Thanks for the hilarious story! I got totally sucked into the stupid Webkinz games a few years ago. Playing for my kids, of course. I was posessed with them and earning points so the pets could eat and buy stuff like swimming pools. So silly! I have never played any FB games after that! Now I have another reason to not get an iphone. Those games are like a huge time suck!

Petit Design Co. said...

bawhahaha that was too funny! LOL

Keriann said...

all i can say is "deja vu"!

Christie // lemon squeezy home said...

Ha ha ha! I love this...it's so crazy how technology can waste so much of our time!!! I also feel like crap when I waste time on the computer or whatever, yet I continue to do it! I just love this story. Thanks for the laugh!

Julie @ Jaybird Quilts said...

thanks for giving me a good laugh! ;-)

Sam said...

This made me LAUGH! Totally been there!

Allison {A Glimpse Inside} said...

Hahahaha! This is so funny! I totally know the feeling!I have a game on my phone called Angry Birds and I can get lost playing this game FOREVER but I don't think I've played it as much as you played this at one time.

Too bad running a restaurant wasn't that easy in real life... you guys would be set!

Gabby Malcuit said...

Hahahaha. Great post. I've never played the games. I'm just not a big computer game person. My husband and his family played farmville for a while, but most of them got tired of it. I blocked all requests from games on Facebook like MafiaWars and such. I'm not too big on applications in general. They get access to everything you've ever put on Facebook, and I know a lot of people that got hacked because of them. I'll admit, I do have a couple applications though. So far, so good.

Brett M said...

that's so funny! I can totally relate. The first fight I remember having with my husband when we got home from our honeymoon was because he changed the channel from American Idol after the results were announced, but the loser hadn't been able to finish his final performance. I was SO MAD that he would change the channel when the show wasn't REALLY over. It's funny now... kind of. :-)

Margie said...

This is too funny, and so true. I used to play farmville, and jokingly said at new years last year that my resolution was to "become a better farmville player". Even though I was kidding...I tried. I'm a much better person now that I've kicked that addiction. No more facebook games for me either. It's bad enough that I loaded facebook on my iphone at all. Now if I could only kick constantly checking my wall.

Sarah said...

Thank you so much for the wonderful post. I know exactly where you are coming from and it is kinda silly. You made my day! Thank you so very much....

The One and Only said...

can I just tell you that have the best stories, seriously!! I read (or stalk, depends on how you look at it) about 20ish blogs everyday (usually twice, once in the morn and once at night, told you a little stalkerish) just to see if they have posted anything new and I'm telling you I so GIQ (giggle inside quietly) when I read your stories so PLEASE KEEP THEM COMING!!

jabeybaby said...

This story made me giggle and I really needed alitlle giggle today. Thanks for sharing. :-)

KarrieLyne said...

oh. my. goodness!! I needed this laugh today, thank you!!! Your story is hysterical! Even funnier that hubby is now addicted too. :)

Lynn S. said...

Ha! I laughed so hard at this! Why? Because you are hilarious and I can relate! I wonder if there's a support group for us that are so addicted to FB games?? LOL
Thanks for the laughs!

Jennifer said...

Too funny! I got addicted to stupid Farmville the summer of 2009 after I'd had a hysterectomy. I got sucked in, and started getting competitive with my "neighbors". I knew I'd stepped over into crazy when I felt guilty that I let my crops "die". I block those suckers now!

Maggie said...

Okay, this was so funny! I hear ya with these games...total time waster if you get sucked in which is why I don't play them!! This post was just awesomeness!!!

Regina said...

That's too funny! I don't even like video games but I play 3 of the Facebook ones. They ARE addicting. I've blocked all others. I don't need the temptation.

Diane said...

oh boy...reminds me of the day I was halk an hour late picking my kids up from school because I was watering thier garden on webkins.

Allison @ House of Hepworths said...

OMG hilarious!!!!!!!!!!! I get that way about Cut the Rope - my new favorite game.

You had me laughing the whole time. You are a great writer!

~Allison @ House of Hepworths

fiberdoodles said...

I am NOT even going there! That is so something I would do! This is just hysterical!!

Wendy said...

ROFLMBO!!! You are so funny! Thank you so much, I haven't laughed like that in like forever! Thank you!!

trish said...

Oh my gosh Vanessa! :o) I laughed then pulled my husband over to read it to him!
You are too funny! :o)

margot said...

Facebook is not my firend right now. I had suspected facebook of acting on its own in the past (issuing invitations to my friends to join while I wasn't even home or on the computer). Here is the biggest thing - I've spent the past 2 weeks running scans, changing passwords, furtively seeking out a way to get the nuisance emails to stop sending using my email. Just discovered that my contact list was hacked THROUGH facebook. It hasn't been fun in the very least.

Glen QuiltSwissy said...

that turtle is the thing I love most!

glen: and you think I'm funny?

marilee said...

that is THE funniest thing I've read in a long time! I laugh because I've become addicted to app games also. Don't play Jojo's fashion or Sally Spa...you'll never put your phone down!

Anonymous said...

Your post was SOOOOO funny. My family and friends and extended family have facebook. It started with farmville and cafe world, then my kids needed me "just" to send gifts in petville and so I did, then would feed my pet now and then, then i would do similar to what you describe, by then my kids have gotten board and moved on to a new game and I then need to maintain theirs because I need stuff. Finally I dropped it to one too much time. recently my son asked me to start a game called Animal planet so him and his friend could have gifts and of course it was actually fun and on and on. I love the villes. I just needed to pick one instead of 5 LOLOL. Which I did so I can get some sleep. You know you have a problem when your out and about with your family and have said " I need to get home by 9, my food will be ready in Cafe World" LOL. done that too;) Being ill can be dangerous:)

Ann Flowers

Christina said...

Guilty! I too have had strikes from facebook. I just started another one but this one is different... I think Im just plain bored with it all... you are too funny! Good you can laugh at yourself and not spend months or years absorbed like that... too funny!

Andi said...

two words...angry. birds.

I laughed so hard...could have written this myself. Thanks for sharing.

vivi said...

hi v
I haven't read all the 50 comments so you must have read lots of comments alike, but I feel so much like you, I'm hooked with cafeworld, and from time to time, I'm in bed and say to myself "this is not real, nothing will happen if I don't put food on the counters" but sometimes i have even texted my sister to ask her to serve the food to avoid it getting spoiled.. freak...
and it doesn't feel as good as sewing or walking with olivia to the ice cream shop, but sometimes I just can't help it
thanks for sharing, are you feeling better??

Ginny said...

This is great! My kids got me playing all those facebook games. Now I play them, and they don't. Such a waste of time, yet I still play.

amylouwhosews said...

this is too funny!! I block all of the game invites I get for this same reason. I've had to uninstall bejeweled blitz so many times it's not even funny.

amylouwhosews said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
amy smart said...

Hah! You crack me up. And yes, this is why I can't even open the floodgates. Not even just a little.

MIchelle said...

So TRUE!!! I also have an addictive personality. I did a few of those for a while, then had to WALK AWAY!!! I think I could waist my life if I didn't. Thanks for sharing your funny story!

danielle said...

first i thought 'gee i'm glad thats not me'...then i hought 'no that sounds kinda cool'...then i tried to download and cant find anything called 'tiny chef'...may be a good thing!

swisspotluck said...

I completely burst out laughing at the sea turtle picture you used for emphasis.

Colleen G said...

OKAY - this was the funniest thing I read in LONG time... Great story! TFS!

Marta said...

I just discovered your blog and oh my, your post,.... I do really understand you,... I was kind of addict to one of these games and, oh my,... my husband does count hours and set alarms just to keep the farm going,... it's a crazy world, maybe all of us would need a nap,... well, nice to "meet" you, I'll keep reading your fab posts from Catalonia!

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